Jun 172009

“Let’s do it tonight,” He said.

The words sent shivers into her, causing her eyes to pop open in a bit of surprise. They had talked about it, oftentimes quite objectively, but now came the time to actually put her mouth into action. He knew she wanted to do it, even if her wholesome soccer mom image was in sharp contrast. A part of her also wanted to resist, but knew it was pointless. Besides His word was final.

Checking, re-checking, spreading things out on the bed, His eyes moved methodically, clicking over mental lists of which she knew nothing. Keeping silent, she let Him move through the necessities until He was ready to pay attention to her again.

“Are you ready,” He asked. She nodded, her voice lost as she gulped back any apprehensions.

Protection was a must. He insisted on safety, always wanting to always keep her from harm, even when it did not occur to her. He reached into His bag, and covered Himself, keeping all delicate areas secure. Watching His ease reminded her how often He had done this before, even though it was their first time. Putting the covering on herself was part of the ritual; He touched her face gently, tucked back her hair, ensured everything was in place, that she was still comfortable about proceeding.

The room seemed warm, almost pressing in on her, on them. She was nervous, almost embarrassed at her naive lack of knowledge. It was something she had seen done but never paid much attention to the finer points; now she wished she had.

She took it in her hand. It was so much bigger than she imagined, and certainly had a lot more weight. The girth, as she gripped it firmly, willing it not to slip from her barely trembling fingers, proved quite substantial. Definitely not what she imagined, she thought to herself, slowly relaxing into Him as He instructed, shared His knowledge, His preferences.

Putting both hands around it, she held it carefully. She knew how potent it was, if nothing else by the way it drew her in, held her attention. Remembering what He said about the necessity for strength in the wrist, she tightened her muscles, yet attempting to keep her legs wide, her body loose, eyes where they needed to be.

Now was the moment to put into play every bit of His lessons, to feel His confidence in her, in what she could accomplish. After all, even though several had done this before her, this was a first time, chosen by Him, accepted by her because she chose Him.

Deep, long… lonnnggg breath in…
Sloooowwwwlllly…. exhalllling….

“And again,” she hears Him say.

Filling her lungs with the heated air, she repeats the breathing exercise a few more times. She flutters her eyes closed for just a microsecond, then focuses them like lasers before her, intent on their goal.

Outtttt when the breath, even, calm. Completely lost in the moment, she didn’t even flinch or buckle when the first crackling explosion came.


The paper target swayed from her first bullet, showing a visible mark, clear where her efforts had gone.

She turned to Him, meeting His wide smile with her own.
She was hooked.

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